As my heart constricted and my stomach knotted, my eyes were drawn to the young man standing before me. On this spring day in the mid 90’s, my weekly psychotherapy session with him was proving to be as fascinating, challenging, and heart-wrenching as most of the others. He vacillated from fighting the demons within to coping with his fear of being seen, being unremittingly vulnerable and, very simply, being.

Here it comes, the litany of curse words and accusations of betrayal… ”fuck you, bitch,” “I hate you,” “I wish I could kill you”… usually followed by screeching, growling and fists pounding the floor and walls. Then, without skipping a beat, he curls up into a ball on the floor… wincing, crying that the “light” inside him is trying to keep the “monster” at bay. “Please help me, Miss Kimble!,” he begs, holding his outstretched arm toward me, his hand reaching out to grasp mine, indicating the need for the strength he derives from safe human touch. “I’m afraid of the darkness,” “It’s bigger than I am,” “I can’t fight it,” “It’s taking over,” “Help me kill it, Miss Kimble!”... typical weekly outcries and desperate behavior from him.

Unfortunately, this young man epitomizes national mental and medical health systemic failure, spiritual repression, and the unchecked re-victimization of our special needs children, and indeed all those identified as mentally “ill,” through labeling, over-diagnosis, and most tragically, a devastating lack of understanding about the genius and necessity that is mental “illness.” He had been diagnosed, and re-diagnosed, with everything from Autism to ADHD to PTSD to Schizophrenia and more. He was medicated, and re-medicated, with a pharmaceutical cornucopia of powerful drugs ranging from sedatives to anti-depressants to anti-psychotics. Nothing worked. His behavior was, and continued to be, bizarre, unsafe, aggressive, and overtly sexual. His history of severe sexual, physical, and emotional trauma, neglect, and abuse – in addition to being forced to witness the same against his little sister – had taken its toll.

What most professionals and practitioners do not realize is that his mechanisms for survival, including the aggression and bizarre personality shifts, had saved him from complete emotional, cognitive and spiritual annihilation. Unfortunately, these same genius defense mechanisms and survival tools were now his undoing, subjecting him to a mental and medical health culture that thrives on labeling, hiding, and shunning those whose extraordinary ability to survive devastating trauma is viewed as “dys” functional.

He is actually a typically adaptive, intelligent, loving boy born into a world, a culture, a family that repeatedly let him down – a system whose efforts to “treat” constitute spiritual repression, shame, fear and nonacceptance in disguise.

As a student of traditional clinical psychology from my early twenties on, I, too was trained and educated to understand mental “illness” as: a breakdown in our brains; as a problem or dis-order; as an internal system which is failing; as a cognitive activity which is undesirable; as a state of mind or being which is worthy of shunning, inhumane treatment, seclusion and denial of human acceptance and validation. Indeed, it took me years of my own self process and healing coupled with an advanced education in transpersonal psychology, the study of the human spirit and other nonphysical aspects of existence, to understand that the misguided and harmful notion that mental “illness” is a severe “dys” function rather than the wonderfully functional coping tool and genius survival mechanism it truly is. What I have come to understand, and believe, is that the human mind, and ultimately the human being, does not create mechanisms or engage in processes which are inherently “harmful” or unnecessary – alternatively, the focus of all human mechanisms is survival!  We employ tools such as depression, schizophrenia, etc., in order to survive a particular, circumstance.

What I witnessed in this young man, which I did not fully understand at the time, was that he was experiencing a classic crisis of spirit, evidenced in the battle between his spiritual being, which he described in the introductory paragraph as the “light” inside of him, and his tormented ego (or sense of being self) which was desperately seeking to maintain cognitive and emotional survival, described earlier as the “monster or darkness” inside him. The coping tools his consciousness utilized during the time of his trauma and abuse, such as schizophrenia and psychosis, were perfectly suited for that situation in maintaining his cognitive and emotional survival – genius, in fact. Unfortunately, and as a matter of course, they became unnecessary when he was removed from his abusive environment and placed in a safe and loving home. In a holistically (spiritual, emotional, cognitive and physical) environment, he would have been appropriately validated and supported in his previous choices while being guided in moving forward in making new choices with regards, his overall functioning and well-being. However, due to the excessive negative focus, labeling, nonacceptance and identification of these coping tools (which he experienced as a rejection of his Self) as errant, undesirable and subject to annihilation and elimination rather than aspects to be honored and healed, he remained stuck in a virtual loop of selfdoubt, recrimination, shame, guilt, confusion and fear.

Interestingly, it is our amazing and “gifted” ability to utilize coping mechanisms such as depression, schizophrenia, multiple personalities, psychosis, and other mental “illnesses” that enable us to survive the often devastating effects of loss, trauma and abuse. Our brains are hard-wired to assist us in our physical, emotional, and cognitive survival under all circumstances – what a tremendous ability and gift! It is unfortunate that our medical and mental health systems and services do not honor these coping and survival tools as the natural gifts they are and instead treat any such “mental” states as illness, disorder, dysfunction and other equally unacceptable and undesirable states of being.

If we are truly seeking to support the healing and wellness of our human/spiritual selves, it is imperative we begin to view and honor what have been previously categorized as mental “illnesses” as states of human and spiritual well-being and tools of mental and emotional reordering, protection, support and health seeking—traits which are as essential to our evolution, survival and well-being as those traits deemed acceptable and desirable such as euphoria, creativity, drive, determination, joy and others. In accepting all of our human traits, abilities and characteristics as necessary and timely, we also honor and nurture an equally significant aspect of our being, our Spirit.

If the educational, mental and medical systems had viewed and treated his so-called “disorders” as magnificent tools of reordering, healing and survival, perhaps he would have been able to move beyond his seemingly permanent state of terror and torment and his resulting socially intolerable and unsafe behavior. Maybe, if he and others like him were validated and honored for their effective utilization of so-called mental “dis-ease” they would be able to embrace, honor, process and move through such periods of difficulty successfully and with grace, resulting in the re-establishment and re-ordering of health and well-being.

So, ponder these words, his story, and this new perspective of viewing mental “illness” as mental “wellness” and embrace and honor yourself as well as others as we experience the often complicated, challenging and blissful journey of human spiritual beingness.

Kimble Greene, Ph.D. is a spiritual intuitive and transpersonal psychology and energy healing practitioner who has been serving individuals, groups, organizations and communities for over 25 years. Dr. Kimble resides in Connecticut; founded, owns and operates; The Sanctuary Center For Healing, a healing, counseling and spiritual center; and Solace Consulting, LLC, a personal, professional and organizational development firm – both are located in Hebron, CT. You can contact Dr. Kimble at; drkimble@thesanctuaryforhealing,.com, 860.316.7530 or www.thesanctuaryforhealing.com.