Elizabeth Barrett Browning had a very different intention with her lovely poem but it brings up a question that I hear from my clients all of the time.... How do I love myself? This is, of course, to be a very personalized answer and I feel is the biggest question that we can ask ourselves each day of our lives. So many of us being caretakers for everyone else in the world, have forgotten how to care for ourselves. We have learned to respond to the needs of others first and put our own needs behind. After years of doing this, we forgot what things fuel us, lift our spirits and make us happy. Disappointment, resentments and frustration, too often then leading to depression, bring our energy down and take the luster out of our beautiful lives. We are lowering our energetic vibration when we lose consciousness of how to love ourselves. There is a cure, a rather simple one, to ignite the spark to love yourself.
To be in love with who you really, truly are, you need to allow all of your needs to be given a priority. Our inner spirit knows what it needs… our divine being within. I will begin the list with some information that has come from my Guides during sessions that address the importance for love and care of the human soul. I ask you to fine tune this and make it your own.
Perhaps put it up where you can see it as you start each day.... take yourself on some good dates.... lavish yourself with self-Love... and enjoy!
1. Say...”I love myself today and will give myself what I need,” when you rise in the morning and do it.
2. Become more present in each moment. Awakening the senses in the body is a wonderful way to do this. Make the agreement with yourself that what comes into you, through your senses, is the very best for you. Become conscious that all that comes into your senses is beautiful. Raise the bar of your standards to meet what you truly need and appreciate.
For your eyes, a beautiful environment...places and things that you love to look at... soothing views... happy environments that please you, whatever it is. My husband enjoys a barn full of his old tools, I enjoy a room full of flowers, candles and crystals…. what do you love to look at and be with.
For your ears, beautiful sounds... music that you love, sounds that sooth and fill you.... for your lips, eat delicious, healthy food, that you love, only let the best come into you. For your nose, fill your environment with your favorite scents and fragrances, or take yourself to nature for that wonderful experience of enjoying your favorite smells. For your touch, wear fabrics that reflect you and your comfort, colors that make you feel good... expressing your true inner self on the outside of your beautiful body. Being in your senses, you become much more aware of the present moment and this is the best posture to have for loving yourself. Your home environment is a place that wants to reflect your inner needs and desires... your car, your work place, all can reflect more of your inner self.
3. Make the agreement with yourself that you only allow positive and uplifting experiences to come around you. I have what I call the “thumbs up rule.” If the experience, thing, relationship, and conversation...whatever... is uplifting to me, raising my energy, making me feel better...I involve myself with it. That’s a thumbs up. If it pulls me down, makes me feel bad, lowers my energy.... I call that thumbs down and excuse myself from it with love. This is a very simple rule to follow and I have found it very helpful in my self-love regiment.
4. Rekindle your relationship with your inner child. If you were to ask the five year old within you, what you wanted to do at this moment, what are those things? I believe that there is part of our true nature that we are born with and it lies within waiting to be rediscovered by our sometimes-laden adult selves. For me, my five year old would play in the mud for hours.... now working with clay and pottery I completely fill that early, earthly delight. Sometimes a good way to access this information is to ask yourself the above question and answer it by writing with your non-dominant hand. Again, we have the answers within and this may bring up surprising and delightful answers.
5. Allow yourself time to just be. Use meditation, walking in nature, whatever helps you to turn off the inner chatter.... turn off the electronics... and find some one to one moments with the most important person in your life...YOU. Sometimes what we need is right on the end of our nose, where it is hardest to see because we walk around with it all of the time. Sometimes it seems way too easy and simple because we are used to making things more complicated for ourselves. Ask your inner knowing what it needs and you will get answers. Clearing time away to listen for this is very important.
6. Create your own bucket list (a list of your life desires) and pick one and do it... just do it. Love yourself enough to give your life what it wants. Don’t wait for an illness, or difficulties to make your desires a priority... do it now. Today is what you have—delight in it. This is a huge way to love yourself. There are plenty of reasons why to put things off... can you change this to plenty of reasons why to do it now?
Start with small things if you need to.... but allow yourself this and you will begin to grow in love with yourself more and more. My Guides have shared that if we all truly can live in our bliss, then our world will become in perfect balance. How can you live in yours?
I ask you to work on your own list now.... I hope that this has fueled some thought and feeling of the importance of you loving yourself. We are in the driver's seat of our lives… make it a beautiful ride.
With Love and Blessings, Kat